Saturday, June 8, 2024

Sketches of a Bipolar Girl: The Doctor Will See You Now

 

Well, the verdict is in for now. After spending the past 2 months trotting from one doctor to another, there is nothing wrong with my back that anyone can see on my MRI and CT scan reports. 

However, there is something there. I can feel it. I'm sitting on it. It causes pressure and pain in my leg at night when I lay down. No matter what position I'm in, my leg goes numb and my foot as well. I'm very depressed about the whole thing. I honestly think that they didn't scan the right place. They didn't go below my sacrum and that's seems to the area of origination. 

The doctor didn't exam me, I just had x-rays and the imaging. The doctor recommended that I reach out to the surgeon that did my original spinal fusion. I couldn't remember his name at first, but I found him. I sent a request for an appointment on Friday. I'm just waiting to hear back from them. 

In the meantime, I'm just in pain. I have left shoulder pain that's more worse than when I first sought treatment. I'm having another MRI in a few weeks. It's like I just get shuffled off to get stuck into a machine. I think I really tore my shoulder the other day. I was bending over to pick up over something off the floor, and felt a burning sensation in my shoulder. 

I'm getting breakout pain from my back and shoulder. I'm lucky if I get 4 hours of sleep. I'm tired. I can see how chronic pain suffers get addicted to painkillers then heroin. It's difficult to live like this. I wish I didn't have to anymore. I'm going to see the neurosurgeon and that's it. After that, I'll just be tired I guess. Maybe I'll try an acupuncturist. Who knows anymore? 

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