Well, I didn't get the job. I did have an interview with Petplan. It's health insurance for pets. It was probably one of the best interviews I ever had. I was relaxed, comfortable, and confident. It's a purely remote position. They provide the equipment. I provide the internet. We have a high speed connection already, but the wifi signal gets weak in the back of the house. Erica said she'd get a wifi booster from Google to fix the problem.
However, I'll have to see if I get the job first. It won't start until January if I do get it. Also, it's a temporary position. It may only last 3 months or they may extend it. That depends on the need. That's what she said anyway.
In the meantime, I'm flat broke. I've got not money, and no food. I'm eating what I have which is bacon and cereal. I have an egg every once in a while. I eat only twice a day now. I've lost almost 10 pounds. Which is fine I guess, but I'd like it to be for another reason other than poverty.
I had a session with my therapist last week, and she gave me some info for food banks and the United Way. I contacted the United Way and got some references from them. I'm behind on my rent, car and loan payments. My cell phone is past due, and I'm barely making my card payments. I haven't paid any medical bills lately. I'm fucked I guess. I think I get my disability this Friday, but it's already spent. I still have to tell Erica I can't pay my rent. I'm so ashamed and embarrassed. I don't know what to do or what to say.
I'm going to check out the references I got from the United Way to see if they can help me. I may have to sell my car. Oh well, she was fun while she lasted. I'm pretty much hating myself right now. Amazon is expecting me back at work in January. I have to tell them it's not going to happen. My resume is all updated and ready to go. I wish I had a skill that went anywhere. I wish I hadn't been such a loser and dropped out of college. I'm only a few credits away from getting my degree, but it's not for anything specific. I should have gotten my degree in biology and gone to med school. But no, I had to have a nervous breakdown and be a loser. Plus, I didn't have any money. I could have figured something out if I really worked at it. I guess I'm just a lazy cow.
I'm going to look into some free language courses on duolingo, and other courses on Coursera. I should learn something. I mean, my mind is not mush. There is something up there. I mean, c'mon, I'm smart right? I've got something to offer don't I? If not, I might as well cash in my chips now and stop draining my family and society. Well, I guess I better get to it. Hopefully, I'll have a job soon and be working on myself. Ciao!
